Choose a quiet moment
Talk one-on-one when you both have time and privacy.
Help a Friend
You can make a difference. You do not have to fix everything yourself.
How can I support someone?
Choose a place to start. Your job is not to have every answer — it is to listen, care, and help connect your friend with support when they want it.
Listen first
Help them feel heard, not judged.
WHAT CAN HELP
- Listen without interrupting.
- Believe what they tell you.
- Ask what they need instead of deciding for them.
- Focus on specific behaviors that concern you.
- Remind them that they deserve respect and safety.
- Keep being a steady friend, even if they are not ready to make a change.
TRY TO AVOID
- Blaming or judging them.
- Insulting the other person or turning it into an argument.
- Telling them they “have to” end the relationship.
- Making promises you may not be able to keep.
- Taking on the role of a counselor or trying to solve everything alone.
Start a conversation
Keep it calm, private, and focused on your friend.
Share what you noticed
Use specific examples instead of labeling the whole relationship.
Ask, then listen
Questions like “How does that make you feel?” can give them room to talk.
Leave the door open
One conversation may not change everything. Let them know you are still there.
Find support
You can help them connect with someone they trust.
People they could talk to
- A parent, caregiver, relative, or other trusted adult
- A school counselor, teacher, nurse, coach, or administrator
- A doctor, therapist, youth advocate, or trained relationship-support service
Let them stay in control
You can offer to sit with them while they make a call, help them find a resource, or walk with them to a trusted adult — but let them choose what feels useful when possible.
Safety matters
Some situations need adult or emergency support.
If you are worried about safety
Tell a trusted adult if you believe your friend may be in danger, is being harmed, or needs more support than you can provide. You can ask an adult for help without having every detail figured out.
Immediate danger
If there is an emergency that threatens life or safety, contact emergency services or get a trusted adult right away.
What can I say?
Simple, supportive words are enough. You do not need a perfect script.
I’m glad you told me.
That doesn’t sound okay. How are you feeling about it?
I’m here for you. You don’t have to figure this out alone.
Do you want me to help you find someone you trust to talk to?
You do not have to carry this alone
Supporting a friend can be a lot.
It is okay for you to talk with a trusted adult too — especially if you are worried about someone’s safety.
This page is informed in part by One Love Foundation guidance about supporting a friend in an unhealthy or abusive relationship. Learn more at One Love ↗
